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Tip of the Week: Recovering Your Power

Powerlessness is a false belief that emotional eaters hold that makes you think you don't have control over your life, and subsequently what you eat. When you recover your power, you can eat sensibly.

Why is recovering your power so important?

If you've been using food to shut down rather than transcend your critical conscience (because you don't want to hear its perfectionistic self-accusations about your worth, your adultness, your style, your friends, your anger, your lovableness, your values, your impulses or its pessimistic projections about your dreams, your ambition, and your ability to handle life), you've stopped or seriously slowed down the natural and necessary separation from your critical conscience. You may have quieted the strong critical voice when it acts up too vigorously by eating, but you remain stuck with its criticisms and demands as soon as the food gets digested.

You recover your power by taking actions in your life. The more you can identify a problem and address it directly, the more confident, self-assured and calm you become. Emotional eaters often tell us that they had no choice but to eat when something stressful was going on. It can certainly feel that way. But succumbing to the craving contributes to the feeling of powerlessness. Finding other options besides food is part of recovering your power. Anytime you are faced with a craving, search for other options. Try one of the other things and see how you feel. Many people report to us that making a new and different choice that doesn't include food gives them a surge of power. Each time you choose something besides food you will get stronger. Over time, you will be the one controlling what you eat instead of food being the thing that controls you. Remember the words of playwright August Wilson, "As my spirit grew bigger, my demons got smaller." You can recover your power over food one powerful choice at a time.


	Make emotional eating, food addiction, overeating, and binge eating a thing of the past! Not only will you see a difference in your body, you will see a difference in how you relate to food and everything else in your life. Click here to join now.

22 Comments In the order they were posted.

Elvira said...

I would like to join and learn more on the emotional eating.

B said...

emotional eating has been my problem for years and i never thought i can live one day without waking up and thinking about my diet and what i am going to eat today but now i grew a lil bit stronger i hope that this day will come when i would prefer to live my life food-free

luu said...

i said I've always loved this site. It gets you a good positive message. And I'm so agree with that "Don't start a new diet, start a new life". I often think that getting a thinner body it'll be the key to the success and things like that. I used to think that and part of me, still does but at least now I'm more conscience of what this problem is: diets don't work. Not on this cases.

L said...

OA is a free, supportive program that is invaluable to people who have issues with food. Contact them in your area...the meetings are great!

Lynn said...

This is a wonderful article and a great site. Emotional eating is a real trigger for me. When something goes wrong at work, I find the vending machine is calling my name and I crave sweets. I'm going to read this article oh, a hundred times until I can get it through my head!

Daniele said...

Fantastic, and absolutely on point. I'm just starting the 2nd part of the book, and I am AMAZED how quickly an overwhelming craving leaves me when I stop to take a *realistic* look at what is going on in that moment.

Jodi said...

wow, I've read books about emotional eating, seen a therapist, a nutrionist, and nothing has pushed the button like these articles. i can see how this rings true for me and knowing is half the battle. reading others comments are helpful in feeling that im not alone as well. ~xoxo

Babbs said...

The book is certainly worth the investment of your time.... what an insightful author who obviously cares and understands the stuggle "we" overweight people share. I continue to read and re-read and know we can overcome. The articles are invaluable!

Arthur said...

This is an incredibly powerful true observation. And it is even worse, I often feel powerless and give in to the eating urge, and then afterwards I look at myself and so: "Miserable human being that you are, how can you walk around with that bulging tummy! When you have an early heart attack you have only yourself to blame! If you drop dead from overeating... your wife and kids shoul know it is your own stupid fault. And then I am tempted to comfort myself with more food... Yuck! But I have tried so hard to get out of the powerlessness .....

sarah said...

I just feel like I will NEVER change no matter how hard I try. I am 36 and I have NEVER been able to change my eating habits and I regularly beat myself up about it and am full of self loathing. WHY can't I change? What is wrong with me?? I suppose I don't know what I should be eating and this freaks me out. I can never tell when I am genuinely hungry or not. It is very scary - I get stressed about it all the time. It's hard to know if I am eating to suppress my emotions or I just fancy a biscuit. What is the difference? Everyone on here seems to know apart from me!?

Carolyn Kay said...

Yep, we're training our brain. That's what I learned in recovering from depression. But I can only do it a little at a time. When I try to do too much, I get overwhelmed and it seems impossible. Carolyn Kay

Juda said...

For years I have read when you get a craving do something else besides eat. For me that always made the craving stronger and until it became an obsession. I learnt over the years to eat what I craved when I craved it because then I would eat a normal quantity not an abnormal or binging quantity. Now having read this article I am making the connection between craving and powerlessness. Maybe after years of normalising cravings I will be able to take back my power and do something different. Here goes!!

cora said...

I read your book but find these daily posts even more helpful. Then I can go back and reread a section. I appreciate everyone's comments and wish us continued awareness and success.

Eli said...

For me, I will rephrase this lesson as: Each time I choose God over food, I will become stronger. God fills up the hurting heart, which is something that food can never do, no matter how much we stuff into our stomachs.

Eli said...

Also, this post helps explain to me why I have not been able to stop eating for the past 2 days. I have felt so powerless because of something my ex did 2 days ago. I didn't have control over what he did, and I don't have control over how to solve the subsequent problem. I felt so beaten down and powerless. I may not even be able to control my emotions in response to this problem, but I can choose to NOT give him control over how I behave.

y said...

We overeaters are physically different in our physical makeup than normal eaters. When we injest certain foods, and foods ladened with chemicals it pushes our brains to eat more and more and more and more and more because we do not feel satiated. Then we beat ourselves up and never look at the real cause foods that are so ladened with sugar, chemicals, etc. and we continue like zombies to endulge instead of changing the food. Took pharmacology in college and sugar is more difficult to get off of than heroin!!! Do yourselves a favour and ditch all sugary foods and give your body a break. Also meat has a lot of hormones injected, not natural from the animal...growth hormones so the producers get more money for the animals weight...this also plays havoc with our chemistry....so watch what you eat and get some relief. It's not all 'mental'.

Shelia said...

"Finding other options besides food" is the difficulty. I need "other options". I don't have a lot of control over my life. Work gets worse and worse all the time because of this economic climate and I can't afford to work part time. Looking all the time but very few jobs out there right now to change to. Exhausted by the time I get home. Live by myself so I don't want to cook. I'm a good cook so I overeat when I cook. Plan to get into the pool in two weeks and get some exercise there. Also thinking about moving to an independent living senior community so my meals are prepared for me. I would eat whatever is put in front of me - I love healthy food, just don't want to prepare it. Having someone to walk with or do things with would also be a bonus. I know what I'm doing wrong - I just don't know what to replace it with.

Margaret said...

Sarah, I want to say to you, I have been there and I have felt that way. Sometimes I still feel that way. Just know that you are not alone. It is part of the journey of discovery in finding who you are, and learning tools to deal with being a 'human being.' : It starts with noticing. Noticing what we say to ourselves and being gentle with those words. My life changed when I discovered that my mother suffered from narcissistic disorder. I understood where my self-loathing began and it opened Pandoras box. I now am working on being "sweet" to me instead of eating sweets to fill that void. Keep reading, reaching out and discovering about yourself.. it will lead you to answers that will help you with your addiction. HUGS. MM.

marcia said...

Hi, Self-love is very important to make changes - we can't self-loathe ourselves into change - sure, it might work short-term but not long-term. A question - I ask myself is "What am I expecting this extra food to do for me?"

sarah said...

I suppose I just feel hungry and I don't like it... grrrr..

RUTH FRIEDMAN said...

Powelessness is a negative emotion, but not the primary one. Many of my clients are in complete control in every other area of their life, but relinquish control when it comes to food. Setmes the issue is more about feeling entitled than powerless. After all, if they can achieve all other goals because they feel deserving, they clearly deserve to eat whatever they want. Evening eating is more about avoiding feelings of dissapointment for a day that should have delivered more than satisfying hunger. When you are reaching for that evening snack, ask yourself if your hunger is for food or for what should have happened today and didn't.

Arthur said...

Goodness gracious this article hit so close to home! I think I have eating to numb that critical conscience. It did not actually work to do much numbing, but it is happening... can I dig myself out from the pile of trash unhappy marriage, struggle for adequate income, difficulty achieving goals that are important to me, difficulty living up to moral standards etc. without a lot of psychological help?

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Shrink Yourself

End Emotional Eating

Tip of the Week: Recovering Your Power

End
Emotional
Eating