*

Tip of the Week: You Need to Weigh Out Your Options

*
AddThis Social Bookmark Button Send item to friends Print article Subscribe
*

For years patients always told me that they believed that eating was their only option. This false belief sent them looking for food when they were overwhelmed, anxious, depressed, bored, or lonely. A conflict would occur and they honestly believed eating was the only solution. Do you ever feel like food is the only comfort you can get?

When my patients told me they believed food was their only option, I worked with them to find other options. They were always surprised at how many choices there actually were when they stopped to think things through. If you fall prey to the common belief that food is your only way out, you can do the same thing on your own that I did with my patients. Slow down and take a good, hard look at things. If you're in a restaurant, go to the bathroom. If you're about to pull into a fast food drive thru, pull over. If you're about to dip into the candy dish at work, go outside for five minutes of fresh air. Wherever you are stop and identify at least three other options you have besides eating. Food can feel like the only way out, but when you use your best thinking you will see what my patients saw, there are always other (and often better) options. These other options will not only help your waistline but they'll help you be more powerful in how you approach life.


* * *
* Shrink Yourself has helped thousands of people with the 12-week online program. With its tested method, it helps you end cravings, food addiction, overeating, emotional eating and even yo-yo diets. Learn about the program! *

13 Comments In the order they were posted.

Sheri said...

I know there are more things to do besides eating but nothing I can think of makes me feel more satisfied and relaxed. Even when I'm vacationing and relaxing it's just not the same without my favorite foods.

Glenda said...

So many times when I want to eat a certain thing---like chocolate or ice cream or cookies that I think I should not have I eat everything else---sort of like eating around it and end up eating more in the long run than if I had just eaten the thing I was craving in the first place. I guess this is the same thing as feeling like food is the only thing that will satisfy me. I wish I could find some thing else that I could do.

Paula said...

Just like Glenda said - if I give up my not so healthy favorite foods muffins then I end up eating something I don't like as much and even though it might be a healthier option, calories are the same or even more. There's no way around it....when the mood strikes...especially after a long day at work when you're just so tired all you need is sit down and enjoy the favorite foods.

n said...

That sounds great, but what about five minutes later, when I have to fight the next battle. Am I to spend the rest of my life mentally wrestling over food, all day, every day? Sounds like hell to me.

carie said...

I can do so well with eating the proper foods and amounts and then in the evening when I lose it. It makes me feel like a failure so much that I don't even want to try anymore. I do want to eat healthier and lose pounds. It is hard when you have family that want a meal and you wish you did not have to prepare it...then you eat the meal, too.

Gaye said...

9 out of 10 times I surrender to food when uncomfortable feelings surround me. Yesterday after meeting with a friend I came home and couldn't help feeling bad. I grabbed the nutella jar but then I put it back saying there are other more reasonable options to deal with this. I felt all this had to do with her, my friend, with the way she talked about my relationship with my bf and with the way she talks in general -she talks way too much and can be quite insensitive. I was so overwhelmed that it was just a matter of time until my next move to the nutella jar, because i had to have an immediate compensation for these annoying feelings that i didn't know how to deal with. A whole ice cream box and some crackers followed the nutella jar and I ended up hating myself for being so weak, as almost always. There's one more thing to it. In fact, I believe this is the breaking point of the entire thing. I find excuses for not leaving the house or the place i'm at. Yesterday it was: Oh i have to do job applications , i shouldn't go out, although i feel like this is what's going to make me feel better. I create the perfect combination in my mind to justify my eating. I didn't even apply to any jobs i was too busy eating. And when i was finished i couldn't cope with anythin else but the regret and self-loathing, so it was a lose-lose situation for me. I think we should learn to give priority to our own feelings and try to elevate and not find some stupid excuses just so we can get trapped in this vicious circle that food creates. Thanks for reading.

Beth said...

Gaye, n, and all, I have suffered the self-loathing you describe. Please pick up the Holy Bible. Jesus Christ is the answer. Trust Him with everything...EVERYTHING. You will feel better immediately. I promise, but more importantly, He promises. I wish you all the best.

maria said...

I know there are other ways to handle emotions besides eating. When I was single, I could take a bubble bath, visit the mall, go out with friends, go to a dance or yoga class, swim, give myself a mani/pedi... With a family to care for including a little kid, and aging parents, a big house, and ailing health I have brain tumors and chronic pain, there is only so much I can do. Taking time out for me isn't usually possible! Food is something quick, easy, and you don't have to leave the house. Sadly, it is the most convenient form of relief. The other hard part is now that I am not emotionally eating, I am telling people how they make me feel, getting angry, etc., and it is making my relationships very difficult. Things went much more smoothly when I just stuffed my feelings down with food. Please recognize that emotional eating is very complicated, and give specific examples of what a person can do when they are in the house caring for children and trying to keep the house relatively mess free, busy all day. In fact, I don't know why I am wasting time writing this!

sasha said...

To comment on what "n" said. Unfortunately most of us that are overweight are already "spending the rest of our life mentally wrestling over food, all day, every day". So if we end up eating healthy at least we will have the benefit of being thinner feeling better about ourselves, etc....just a thought.

h said...

Wow... agree with all of the above, but does anyone have any POSITIVE suggestions here? Reading all these negative thoughts and feelings only make me feel worse. Like Maria offered, does anyone have any positive and specific examples of what HAS worked for them??

Carol said...

After reading the comments, I felt I had to respond to h, who wanted some POSITIVE suggestions. ANY other activity besides eating would be preferable to making the choice to overeat and regret it. The activity doesn't even matter. I could suggest writing in a journal in order to express one's uncomfortable feelings, which would "sound" good, but it's no better than working on a crossword puzzle, really. It's the power of making a different choice that empowers us to continue doing so the NEXT time temptation arises. Gaye said "9 times out of 10..." and I suggest she look at the 10th time and ask herself how she made a different choice. I know that making the choice NOT to eat is difficult, because as Sheri commented, eating is easy and satisfying! But only in the short term. Finding altenative ways to cope with feeling uncomfortable will BE UNCOMFORTABLE until we've developed a new habit that supercedes the old habit of turning to food. I know that if I have made the right choice one time, I can do it again. It's a process, and the path may not be straight, but I know that each one of us is capable of making a good choice, one choice at a time. I wish all of us well on our journey to health.

Nancy said...

Dear h and everyone else, Some positive things I do that may be helpful to you: I created a spreadsheet you don't have to do this on a computer - I'm a geek, so it's fun for me. It keeps track of everything I eat, calories, weight, exercise and compares those things to my goals. There are also some nifty graphs and a link to a free website that has nutrition data. Anyway, when I feel like eating for no reason, I go update my spreadsheet or check out the food I'm obsessing over on Nutrition.Data.com, and read all about what's in it. The moment passes, and I feel good looking at my progress on the graphs. Or I decide on something to eat, but it's a conscious decision. But you may not be an Excel spreadsheet nut, so here's another idea. I wrote a list of everything that needed to be done in and around my home as a project or on a regular basis. Again, I used a spreadsheet, but for this one, a pen and paper is probably even better for the satisfaction of crossing things off the list. For most of the chores, I broke them down into 5-15 minute tasks. Now when I start thinking about what's good in the pantry, I do a quick task and again, the moment passes, or I decide it really is time to eat. Then there's snacking mindlessly when I watched TV. Now, I'm watching TV less because the weight loss and progress have given me more energy, but when I do watch, I was finding that I was fighting the urge to snack. Then I remembered what I did when I quit smoking 25 years ago. I had to give up tea for quite some time because of the strong association I had with drinking a cup and smoking. I don't want to give up all TV, so instead, I left my usual place on the sofa and now sit in an arm chair. Strange but true, I have many fewer urges to snack. And when I do decide to eat something, I don't do it while sitting in an arm chair. And, of course, I check my spreadsheet first to see what type of food I need to have to balance out my day. Lastly, I buy only what I think of as "high value" items: fresh fruit and vegetables, low- or non-fat dairy, lean meats that I use more as a garnish than as a main dish and whole grains. No more sugar substitutes, no highly processed food. When I want cookies, no more cold cookies from a box. I use real ingredients, enjoy making them and the aroma is wonderful.

Donna said...

Nancy, I concur and the list is pure genius. I also have a running list of books, movies, websites, places non food ,classes to try. I use the lists now for rainy days , sunny days as quick reminders of options. I do understand that sometimes we are so challenged that we just use an old habit of instant comfort. I am really working on that and try to email myself and write it out and release instead of swallowing what it is. most recently I have learned that there are moments when I get home from a grueling day at work that a shower and something to drink followed by bed is what I really need.

Leave a Comment

Your Name:


Your Email:

Required but not revealed.
We NEVER share your email address. Click here for our policies.

Your Comment:


Share With a Friend

AddThis Social Bookmark Button Send item to friends Print article Subscribe